The world today is a hot mess! There are more broken homes, broken dreams, lives, spirits, minds, and hearts than you can ever imagine. Within one generation we went from “Father knows best” to “Married with Children” and ended up at “Modern Family”. Here are 2 ways men are failing their families and why there is hope.
How men are failing their families: Failed to lead the family
Fathers have gone from being the firm and loving answer-man seated at the head of the table with mom, by his side, agreeing with every word that came out of his mouth to being seated on the la-z-boy with a drink in one hand and the remote in the other to actually being furniture himself: father’s opinions no longer matter; they are constantly the subject of ridicule and pity in every genre of shows available on tv these days.
Read: 3 Secrets to Navigating the Cultural Minefields
All in all, they’ve become a hindrance to the enjoyment of the children and a wet blanket on the vivaciousness and the ageless sensuality of the mother. Simply put: a sperm donor you happen to know on a personal level.
How men are failing their families: Willingly absent
You see, the trouble with what I’ve said is that not only did it happen, men let it happen! We were more than ready, willing, and able to let moms and the government pick up the slack where we felt we needed some well-deserved rest. We slowly and surely faded into the background until we simply became noise.
Meanwhile, children of all ages experiment with drugs, alcohol, sex at younger and younger ages. Suicide, teen pregnancies, abortions, violence, and relational conflicts all stem from the lack of the father in the home for whatever reason or his tacit abdication: many fathers are there physically, just not present mentally.
Oh, but we were meant for so much more! God had something totally different in mind when He created Adam. As the first human, and as the first man, Adam would be the prototype of everything God envisioned men to be: accountable to God and responsible for the wellbeing of others around him.
But when Adam, having let the devil deceive his wife and not refusing to partake of the forbidden fruit himself, opened the door for Satan, he abdicated his dominion over the Earth to the devil, and it’s been a struggle ever since.
Hope: No Longer Bound by Our Mistakes
As Born-again, Spirit-filled, Bible-believing Christians, this doesn’t have to be our lot as well. Jesus nailed that curse to the Cross on Calvary. We are no longer bound by it and we can and need to refuse to live under it.
As Men of God, we need to shine brightly to our families around us, especially our children, and show them that there is another, a better answer to the nihilism the world has to offer. As godly men, we need to teach, model, and show our children their true worth; as they look into our eyes they need to see their reflection in their Heavenly Father’s eyes.
As Kingdom men, Kingdom husbands, and Kingdom fathers, our calling is to show our children what it’s like to be loved by God and godly men. When we live as Kingdom men, we are the legitimate representatives of God in the lives of our children.
As the father of two little girls, I need them to see as early as possible and as often as possible what it’s like to be loved by godly men. God calls us. Kingdom Men, Joshua’s Outpost Men, to be a reflection, a reproduction of His love; children (boys and girls) need to build their images of themselves based upon what God says about them, not what the world tells them, and they need to hear from us, their fathers.
Bondservant to Jesus Christ, Married to Michele, Dad to Madelyn, Claudia, and Joseph and educator by trade, apologist by calling and saved by Grace. Antonio loves to read, write, and discuss all-things-apologetics. He has many passions in life including reaching, teaching, and keeping men for Jesus Christ. Waiting on God’s big reveal: Antonio knows He has something beautiful in mind.
Men fail their children when they fail to realise the unconditional and very personal love that their Father God has for them and then fail to show the joy and love that flows from their relationship with their Heavenly Father.
I agree wholeheartedly with that Carrie. This is an area some men fail in when parenting their children. This could be because they haven’t experienced the joy and love from
God or come to know how much God loves them. Thanks for the comment.
Culture, I feel, has a way of forcing their views on us, even us as Christians. Too often we take on the role of provider, and that is the only role we take on; lover, friend, counselor, etc: we leave those to mom. Years later, with a head full of regret, we wake up and want back the years the locusts have stolen. My prayer for my family is that I would shake off the image the world wants me to conform to and be transformed by the renewing of my miond in Christ Jesus.